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It’s been a while…

the last time i wrote in here, i was 25yrs old, i was 159lbs…

but now i am 27 and 145lbs.

Since the last time I wrote, my weight rose way up to 180lbs. Then I left my boyfriend, moved back at home and lost all this weight. 35lbs lost since May 2012.

Right now I am dating this new guy. I tend to date huskier men. Not this time. He is fit, toned…so good looking. And i feel so conscious around him. He tells me that i do not need to lose weight, but i feel like he deserves to be with someone who is thin and beautiful. I dont express my inner feelings about my weight to him, but I think he knows that i’m not happy with my body.

Dont get me wrong, i am WAY happier then when i was 180lbs….

But those feelings…those inner thin feelings…the want and need to be that way is starting to come back.

I just ate…and purged. i havent done it in a long while. But i feel better that i did it.

15 more lbs and I’ll finally reach my FIRST goal weight.

After that, another journey to lose an additional 10 lbs and i will be back to my high school weight. HIGH SCHOOL. That was 10 fucking years ago for me!!

well…thats about it for now.

Please let this motivation stay to lose that last bit of weight…

SSTT xoxo <3

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